Update time

I know, I know, I know. It has been way to long since I have posted anything on here. Just under a month actually. Not good. But now it is time for an update as to how I am doing and whats been happening.
Well to start,  thursday, 28 August, is my retirement date. This upcoming weekend will be my first weekend as a civilian in the past 9 years. I am looking forward to it but also a bit nervous. I have money saved up but at the same time, I want to keep it saved and not have to spend it. I guess time will tell what happens.
On the money note, I have an appointment with the Department of Social Security tomorrow to see if I qualify for getting disability for a while until I can get my schooling worked out and to get my VA disability up to 100%! That is going to be a huge chore in its self, but if I can get the Disabled Social Security it will help me relax a bunch and Ill be able to make sure that everything is correct.
On to the rest. I have been working on my legs a whole lot more than I was before because I don't want to be one of those guys that has a muscular upper body and little stick legs. That would be terrible!! I am able to semi-squat up to 95 pounds right now. I say semi-squat because I still need to have the bench underneath me in case I can't stand up. But I have been able to use a lower bench and a Bosu ball on top of it in order to cushion my spine. I wish the blog would allow me to post videos because I do have one. I have been making sure that my knees stay behind my toes in order to do correct form on my squats. Same thing for my dead lifts, need to make sure my knees stay behind my toes. As I said though, I am making progress. It seems to be a bit faster than normal due to the fact that I am basically  starting from scratch.
On Thursday I am going to get my custom AFO. It is supposed to be a short, articulating AFO. I am hoping that it will help me walk a bit better and even maybe help me run. I only have a few more months to complete my New Years resolution. I WILL complete it though!
I am going to try to post more but like I have said before, I don't really want to just post about what I do every day because there are too many people out there doing that. Maybe I can change it up a bit and post about hardships I face in my day. There usually isn't many but if it happens I will let everyone know!

The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus. ~Bruce Lee

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Medication Success

Well, it has been about two and a half weeks since I have taken any pain meds more than some Tylenol. There have been many times that I have wanted to take it but I have stayed strong, so to speak. I have never been one to take a lot of medication so I have been working on getting myself off of  my medications. It is still hard and I need to take some stuff still. I am hoping that it will get to the point that I will not need to take any more medications. That is my goal.

I feel like I have been doing well building muscle back up. I am still not as strong as I was before my accident but I am working on it every day. The one thing that is taking forever is building my legs back up. I don't know if it is taking so long because of my spinal cord injury or if it is just taking time because that is how it works. I am hoping that my spinal cord injury isn't still effecting everything but I don't know a way that I can test it. I am thinking that once it is time for me to be back at the VA for my annual check up that they will be able to tell me one way or the other. I guess we will just have to wait a few months and figure that out!

Your problem isn't the problem. Your reaction is the problem. ~Anonymous

Hmmmm....

This blog thing is a lot harder than I thought it was going to be. I don't want to bore everyone with my daily activities but trying to find legitimate things to talk about is proving harder than expected. One thing that I really didn't want to make a big deal about was the the tenth was my one year anniversary of my motorcycle accident.
The only reason that I am writing about it now is because I do need to address it. To me, it was just another day. I honestly had forgotten that it was on the tenth until I was talking with my sister and it was brought up. Thats how little the day really does mean to me. I am not worried about something happening on that day or being jinxed by the tenth of July. Nothing like that really matters. I know that there were a few people that didn't realize it until my mom posted something about it on Facebook. I got a few text messages saying that the person was glad that I am doing well and good job but to me, it really isn't anything to celebrate.
I am still here and I am not going to let something small like the motorcycle accident stop me from living up to my full potential. I have worked so damn hard to get where I am and will continue to bust my ass, well, forever. I will never be satisfied with just settling for where I am. I am still being held back by my injuries and until that is no longer a factor I will continue to find different ways to try to heal myself and get back to where I was before. It is true, I know that some things will never be the same. Mainly my shoulder and the nerve damage that was caused. But I can still push myself to improve.
Everyone tells me that I will continue to make improvements and my nerves will very minutely heal for up to two years after my accident. What do I think about that? Crap. I will not stop just because time has passed. I will not give up on becoming what I want to be just because science has proven this or that. The doctors told me that there was a good chance that I would never walk again. So much for that science right?
All in all a year has come and gone and I don't care. I am not going to let something as silly as that stop me from doing what I want to do and being all that I truly can be.

The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thinking time

So this blog thing is a lot harder than I ever thought that it would be. I am having a hard time coming up with topics to talk about. This isn't a blog about what I do every day so there is no real reason to talk about that. I have to think a bunch in order to come up with topics that I should write about. I want to write about things that people in my position may go through so I hope that this is helping even though I don't post much. Im trying!

This time I am going to talk my thoughts "out loud" on my occupation therapy. I have been doing a lot of gym time. That is pretty much all I do for my therapy now. I have passed the rehabilitation phase and now I am into the recovery phase. With that being said, I don't really know how much my occupational therapy is doing for me. For those that don't really know, OT is pretty much just working on my shoulder. I have been doing it twice a week since I became an outpatient at the VA. The only thing that I do at OT is electric stimulation on my shoulder and then use a machine that works on my grip, pinch, and hand strength. It has, however, gotten to the point that I don't think the electric stimulation, or E-stim, is doing anything for me anymore. I feel that I am getting just as much result from lifting weights as I am for the E-stim.
I used to use E-stim on my whole shoulder. Front, side, rear, and rotation of it. Now the only thing that I need to work on with the E-stim is external rotation. That is, keeping my elbow at my side and rotating my arm so my wrist is as far away from my body as it can be. That is the only part of my shoulder that is still lacking enough that I feel I need to work on.
Holding the heavy weights and other things while in the gym is what is working my grip strength. I don't feel that my pinch is too much weaker. I know that it is from the last tests that I did but I don't feel that the machine is helping me out anymore. I don't know. I think that I might just make OT once a week and use the time to get to the gym longer. We will see how it goes at the next few sessions.
Thursday I am actually going to the pre separation counseling so I will let everyone know how that goes. I was supposed to go the other week but they told me once I got there I was supposed to be in uniform. I haven't worn a uniform in over a year!! I had no idea. I have my uniform all set already so it should be an easy day. I just hope it leaves me time for the gym. We shall see!


Opportunities don't happen, you create them. ~Chris Grosser

Disability explanation

Its been a while since I have posted but Like I said on my last post, I will explain what my disability will be.

I finally got my findings back from Washington and they were a bit less than I expected. I ended up getting 70% from the DOD and 90% from the VA. The VA is what I was hoping to get 100% on. What that means is that I will be getting about $1700.00 a month for disability. That, plus social security should help me get to what I am at right now. I can be collecting social security until I am able to get a job. Because I don't, and probably can't get a job doing anything that I would want to do I am going to go to school instead. Because I have been in the Navy for longer than 3 years I will get 100% of my 9/11 G.I. Bill. It will help because I won't have the extra money to pay for school.

The reason that I say I was hoping to get a higher percentage is because It will get me more benefits. Even though at 90% I am still going to be covered in all my medical. Even when i do get a family they will be covered with health insurance for much less than anywhere else. 

Once I am retired I am going to be able to put in an appeal in order to get a higher percentage. I feel that there is some things that are getting overlooked. The VA gave me 50% disability for my SCI and 40% for my shoulder. Because of how my shoulder is recovering I feel that I should be getting more of a percentage. I still don't have full range of motion in my shoulder and there is still numbness in my arm that I don't think will ever go away. That is why I feel that I deserve more.

Another reason that I am trying to get a higher percentage is because I am trying to look at the future. The only thing that the DOD and VA looked at is what is going on in the present. I know that down the road, no matter how good of shape I stay in and no matter how good I take care of myself I know that this is going to affect how I live in the future. I know that as things happen to me I can get the VA to increase my percentage but I am trying to deal with the head ache now instead of in the future when it will be a real problem.

There are a few things that I also think could help with my percentage. The biggest thing is that I do think I have tinnitus. It doesn't really cross my mind much because I always have music or the television on. However, when it is quite I think it does affect me. I cannot sleep in silence. I either have to have the TV on or a fan making noise. I have tried it and the silence makes it so I have a very faint ringing in my ears. It is of course from my job and how noisy everything I do is. Other things are the trouble I have with bowel/bladder. It is gross and I don't really want to go into that but that is also something big that can get me a higher percentage. 

I have a meeting with the Navy career counselors tomorrow that should explain more of the benefits that I will be getting so I can explain that at the end of the day. 

Good things come to people who wait, but better things come to those who go out and get them. ~Anonymous

Hopefully relaxing

Getting my tattoo finished today, hopefully it will be relaxing but I doubt it. I had to deal with the navy junk today, that was stupid. I went in at 7:30 this morning only to find out I really didn't need to be there until later. The good part about it was I got done early and was able to get my gym session in. That made my day luckily. 

Always strive for what you want, even if no one is cheering you on. 

Retirement is looming

First off, I have to apologize for not writing enough. I to me it feels like I shouldn't just write random things about my day. I don't want to bore people, it has to be something of substance. Maybe about any struggles I am having though out the day? We will see.
Onto the real reason for this post, my navy stuff. I am getting up early tomorrow to take care of a bunch of pre separation things that need to be done. I am hoping that I will be able to knock a lot of things out at once, but we will see. Today I officially signed the paperwork saying that I have accepted the findings that the VA and government have decided on my disability. I will tell you all about those findings in another post. I thought I had written about them but I have not yet.
Tomorrow I am going to give everyone that needs it a copy of my findings. It will be good to get things moving. Now I just need to start thinking about schooling and all that. That is also another post. Tomorrow I am also going to be doing some pre separation counseling with the navy people. I think that a lot of the things that I have to do are going to bore the hell out of me because I have been thinking about all of this for a long time and I also have a lot of people at the VA that I have already talked to about it all. If all this stuff was not mandatory I wouldn't do it. In order to get paid after I retire it has to be completed so I will do it without a doubt.
My official retirement date will be the 28th of August. I chose the latest date I could in order to make sure that all of my stuff will be completed by then. After that date, I am a free man! Ill get the summer, or what is left of it, to relax before school starts and other things begin. Normal schooling, maybe some culinary arts classes, getting my pilots license, and continuing with therapy and of course the gym every day. Its going to be busy but also a lot of fun. New experiences can't be beat. If I save up enough maybe I'll do some traveling to other countries!
Again, I will start writing more. Sorry for the delay!

Failure defeats losers but inspires winners.